The Journey

So you're thinking, "The Journey" what is this all about?" Well let me explain!

I have always been inspired by poetry as you can tell by now but there is more to a story than meets the eye. I am also appreciative of and have an appetite for art, travel and photography. Since my journey in France, I have been so privileged to experience all of the above first hand and thud have been profiting from its rich literary and artistic history as well as the wonderful scenery and nature in all her glory. All of these things have contributed to my experiences and my journey here thus far and to add to it I am going to embark on a new journey, using the splendor of France as my map and guide. 

This journey is called Poetry Month (which begins in the month of April) and so the challenge is to write a new poem everyday for the entire month of April. This journey will not be a walk in the park but I embark on it nonetheless...Wish me Luck!

And so I kick off Poetry Month with:

(April 1st 2012)

Doubt!

You! Have overshadowed my power

To recover from a customary blow

Dampened my desires by the hour

I hear to you telling me to let go

You! Have twisted all my beliefs

Ripped all my hopes to mere shreds

Never a free moment, never a relief

Creeping into and invading my head

You! Have been there telling me lies

Held me back from so many dreams

Looking at me with deceptive eyes

Saying that life is never as it seems

You have stopped me from touching stars

Replacing all my optimism with fear

Reminded me of deep, painful scars

Always faithful, ever present...near!

You have managed to steal my joy

Made me afraid of the spotlight

All my hard work, all I built you destroyed

Stripped me all of strength and might

Never have you given me a chance;

To believe in the things that were great

You could never allow me to enhance;

My endowments... so simply innate

I have allowed you to enjoy my company

 No Doubt! You surely had a ball

But I’ve decided to work on a new me

So your presence isn’t needed at all.

(April 2nd 2012)

I Have Demons...
Opens with Billie Holiday's Solitude

"In my solitude 

You haunt me 

With reveries 

Of days gone by.

In my solitude

You taunt me

With memories

That never die."

You've always wanted to know

What I keep in that box over there 

I never told its my box of sorrow

Cause I didn't want you to worry dear

You've always looked at me and said I'm cold

I'm not inviting, I never smile

But I've got deep scars and stories untold

That leave a taste in my mouth, that's worst than bile

You've always observed my head hung low

The fact that I'm most times alone 

Whenever I speak its careful and slow

Into this strange manner I've grown

You've always asked me way too much

Why, When, Where and How

Have you ever fell in love? Do you need a gentle touch

Have you ever in your life been endowed

You really want to know, don't you?

All the things often going through my head 

What did you say? You want details too?

Honey somethings are better left unsaid.

Alright okay, so like a child you insist 

C'mon tell me the things that are true 

I never ever do this, as you see I resist 

But just this one time, only for you

Okay so that box over there that I hide

Has the filthy clothes that I wore 

The day that bastard stripped away my pride

And left me feeling rotten to the core

I'll tell you my love why so cold I seem 

And why the smile on my face never lasts 

Its because I can never forget and just dream

Without being enraged by the past

Yes you're right, my head's never high

And I'm all by myself, I confess

But I never look up, there ain't much in the sky

That could make me feel pain any less

Whenever I speak, my words I do choose

I'm afraid of my secrets coming out 

And yes I do fall love! But even that I refuse

Cause I'm insecure and so full of doubt

Do I need a gentle touch you ask?

I don't know, not sure how it feels.

What I do want is not to wear this mask

And unchain this poor heart of pure steel

In that box over there, there are demons

That are too big for you too control 

I admit right now, I've got demons

But don't worry, I'll get back my soul!


(April 3rd 2012)
Paris on My Mind

Inspired by the song, "I've got Love on my mind" by Natalie Cole

To myself, I'd always say...

"To Paris I'll go and fall in love one day

Dreamer, dreamer, yes a dreamer am I

And boy oh boy did you! catch my eye

I remember the day that we first met

The effect you had on me, I'll never forget

I felt a twinkling, butterflies danced in my heart

From then I knew, nothing could keep us apart

Excitement built like climax more and more

Of nothing in my life I've never been more sure

The more you showed me, the more I wanted to see

You're just as in my dream...a guy of mystery

You're so full of surprises, that I'm nothing but thrilled 

You indulge me and entice me until I'm fulfilled

Every corner and crevice of you, I utterly adore

And I'm certain that you have got better in store

You're rough around the edges, just the way I desire

There's never a dull moment with you , you always take me higher

The breathtaking beauty that shines from your eyes

Soothes and gives me comfort like words from the wise

I see different sides to you with the change of every season 

And so I love you more each time, I don't need another reason

I open myself to you, do with me as you so please

Embrace me, caress me and touch me with ease

You're most wondrous I heard, at this time of year

Show me more, arouse me, ravish me my dear

This yearning takes me over, I'm bludgeoned by lust

Enrapture me, seduce me, mesmerize me if you must.

Right now! I'm simply all yours for the taking

These sensuous, intense moments, I'm not forsaking

Darling, I'm not really sure if there'll be another time

So make sure that "La Belle Paris" is always on my mind.

(April 4th 2012)
Words

Just like the smallest stone thrown into a still lake

Words have a ripple effect that can make us break.

Sticks and stones may break my bones...

...And words, words can always hurt me!

My parents always said that 

As a child, I often talked too much 

As a matter of fact, Mom said

I said my first word at 9 months old

...It was "Dada" 

(God knows how much I loved that man)

Mom often tells me ..."No wonder you ended up a language major and not a pathologist...

...Talkative people simply don't work with the dead!"

She also says it no doubt I'm a poet...this is as a result of them ignoring me because I talked so much, thus I had no choice but to write!"

But word...words, It all began with words;

God's words, her words, our words, these words.

Words... both the disease and the cure

Stripping you to less or offering you more

Simply by word, the word got it's form 

And by words and words alone a man can be transformed

Life and death are in the power of the tongue

Words can elevate you fast and in the same way bring you down

I can speak words, I can feel words, they touch me caress me, suppress me, depress me, arrest me and oppress me.

They can impress me, possess me, bless me, progress me and sometimes undress me!

I can taste words. They can be sweet as honey when whispered or bitter to the core when you're mad. They can be flavorful and mouthwatering when you're in the mood or tasteless and bland when you're sad.

I can touch words just like words touch me. They can be gentle and have so much depth or they can be rugged if you like the roughness effect. I can see words by the actions of others and I can smell them when they perfume the air.

Words bring tears of joy or 

They bring tears of sorrow

They can comfort in dark moments

And give hope for a better tomorrow

With words I can stand like a goddess on my throne!

Or I can curl like a dying flower in a corner alone.

With words I can fight causes and with words I can wage war

Broken words are often what men kill and die for.

It's a weapon important to poets, like a singer relies on his voice

Words demand answers and sometimes leaves us no other choice

Words can create, generate, and build up...

Just as they can disintegrate, degenerate and break down!

Words can trigger war or promote peace

They can breathe hatred or define love

They can pinpoint many personalities,

Words can often juggle memories.

They're the judge of the human character

Certain words we can never forget

They're often the determining factor

In a matter of life and death.

Words can:

Relieve stress

Conceive ideas

Achieve greatness

Deceive Men!

They mold minds, touch hearts, fill emptiness and change lives.

Lies are words 

Promises are words

Letters and stories are words

Contradictions are words 

Confessions are words

But with words, still,

With words you can pursue me and with words you can indulge me

Words they precede me as well as they ensue me.

With words you choose me and

With words you confused me

With words you used me

With words you refused me

Why with words you abused me?

With words you also lose me.

I give you my word

You gave me your word

I stick to my word

But with words you turn around and deceive me.

Words are sometimes my worst enemy but can still be my very best friend
They always tend to find me. They confine me, entwine me, refine me, 
enshrine me, outline me, intertwine me and somehow define me.
How do I really feel about words? Okay, I'll tell you!

My Dad's words I held on to all the time

I can still replay all them clearly in my mind

None of his promises ever occurred

So you see, I sometimes have a hard time; 
Trusting words.

(April 5th 2012)
Misunderstood

They said that you were up to no good
That you would amount to nothing
That you were surely going nowhere
And that if I wasn't careful, you'd take me there


Some called it the road of no return 
Others said it's the pith of hell
Neighbors believed that you'd never learn
They claimed to know you oh! so well


There's this talk that your grandfather did
Nothing with his life, that your father did it 
Better than him and that you, you were just 
Destined and bound to outdo them both.


They said you never finished anything you began
That you dropped out of everything, even life
And now you look for every excuse to explain your messed up
Situation... You think that society owes you something!


They put you in a category, labeling you as a dose of
Deadly poison, a drug that serves no real purpose and
Even if you were useful for anything, that you side-effects
Are dangerous, life-threatening...lethal!


They said that you were like a bad habit 
Hard to shake, almost like an addiction that's impossible,
To break, a type of disease, to which science is unsure,
And that the symptoms are so bad, there is no possible cure.


Not ever did they mention though 
That you were full of sorrow
That you've been carrying the burden of past generations
That yours, is a hard act to follow!


They somehow never speak about your heart so big...sincere!
And the fact that if they needed you, in a heartbeat you'd be there!
They simply just can't see that behind all those demons you're strong!
So why is it that you're not driven and compelled to prove them wrong?


(April 6th 2012)
Sonnet II (He)
His deep eyes, what a story they tell,
His subtle stares, they somehow captivate
His presence upon you, cast a spell
With one step towards him, you gravitate
Never let him see you heart on your sleeve
He's got a way to entrap you so fast 
Be careful his looks can sometimes deceive
And his loyalty to you may not last 
He has many ways to control your mind
It's so hard to get yourself unattached
Then suddenly you're completely entwined
Because your heart and your soul he has snatched
He may be disguised as a faithful friend
Get not your hopes up, all things have an end!


(April 7th 2012)
The World Through My Eyes

I find glasses so cute, so much so that I would often try them on whenever I would go into stores or always wore my Dad's every time he took them off, somehow almost unconsciously implying that my vision was blurred or defective. Strange! because I never needed them! I've got perfect vision!...Well at least so my optometrist told me.


I somehow do not believe him though... If I have 20/20 vision, then how come I can't see when someone's going to betray me, forsake me, take advantage of me or be mistaken about me. How come I don't see the malice in people's hearts, the envy towards me, the traps being set for my downfall or the pits being dug for my demise?


How come I don't see the pretense on faces with each accomplishment I make, the grinding of teeth when I achieve greatness or receive good things. I don't see the eyes rolled back every time I mention a new adventure, trod down a new avenue in life or have a dream of mine come true or the rage that ignites them like a fire in their soul?


How come I cannot, for the life of me, discern the false friends from the true enemies or the strangers that they have become? How is it that I can't see the knife in hand before it is stuck in my back, the resentment hidden in a smile or all the bad intentions wrapped nicely in a disguised gift of kindness and best wishes?


How come I don't see the "I knew it!" in an "It's going to be alright"or the fact that I'm kept close by because I'm useful? How is it that I can't see when I'm being cheated, robbed, exploited, and beaten down into the mud? I cannot get it Doc, can you somehow  explain this me? Test my eyes again and tell me what you see?

Can you explain how on God's green earth I cannot see those climbing up behind me with the sole purpose of pulling me down or those shadows that look just like mine because some would really like to me be me. Good Luck with that! Sometimes I wonder if I've got some mystery illness,  one that maybe you've just never heard of!


There must be something Doc, because I can never understand how I cannot see the fury hidden in a simple "I'm so happy for you" or the genuine hate in a "pretend to be sincere" I Love you" , "I'm so proud of you", "You more than deserve it" The anger they feel deep down or hope that you never make it. How don't I see the plans made to ruin my success?


How can this be? I really need a remedy Doc. Can you prescribe something for me? A pair of specs maybe...to inspect the situations around me. Prescribe me some special lens, like transition so that for every transition in my life I can see clearly.  Doc! Are you sure about my vision? Maybe I have astigmatism?


I need something strong! Lens of prudence so that I can see from far off all that negativity that somehow blinds me. I need some sort of lens with an accurate sense of discernment to tell the darkness from the light or by chance do you have something kinda microscopic so I can plainly see the parasites? I need lens of diligence Doc, for the fine print I need to be able to read!


No! but really Doc...Are you certain I'm not going blind? There must be some kind of diagnosis you can find. I'm telling you there's something affecting my view; Find it Doc! Check you medical books if you have to. I need to know this condition and I need to know it by name! and then find me a lens so that I won't see things the same!


...And by chance, can I have a stylish frame?


(April 8th 2012)
Somewhere In the World

 Right now, somewhere in the world
There exists a little girl 
Who's got a really strange attire
She's just lost everything in a fire 


Watching all that's dear to her go up in smoke
And with every crackle, the more her fragile heart broke
Another painful tear, just dropped from her glassy eyes
She's not strong enough to accept unexpected goodbyes


Clenching tightly in her hands, her favorite teddy bear
For it's all she has left now, so to her he's dear
She doesn't at such an age, fully understand
That this fire signifies for her people, a kind of reprimand


Somewhere not to far off in the world 
A little boy is witnessing some horror unfold
He wishes he could stop it, he would do all he can
Not knowing this unconsciously shapes him as a man


He lives this nightmare to him nothing else is known
It's a culture his people calls "defending your own"
For him now, it's some kind of strange and twisted norm
One to which he he'll have to, eventually conform


He'll never know the beauty, that exists in a gentle touch 
But he'd learn to embrace a loaded gun, and love it just as much
He'll only be praised on the fact, that he can use it well
And pride for him will only come from the drop of every shell


Somewhere in the sad, torn world
Two innocent lives are being sold
And all sign of hope for them is gone
There are butchers out there to take them at any cost


Somewhere in this small world, not to far
There's an angelic face, wishing on a star
She's got not a problem to worry about
Her future is secure without a shadow of a doubt


She may never know really know, of all elsewhere
It can only be expected, that someday she will care
Somewhere there's injustice, in the world out there
And for those poor, lost, battered souls, Oh God, its just not fair!


(April 9th 2012)
Spring
Oh! How these April raindrops fall
Like diamonds from the sky
And April birdies sing to all
Sweet springtime lullabies


April buds they open slow
Their beauty oh! so rare
What great splendor they doth show!
As they embellish the air!


If one should sing a song of spring
It would be a wondrous song
Of all the joy this season brings
That could last the whole year long